32 weeks pregnant... huge, happy, sneezy, uncomfortable, excited, etc.

I'll get my 32 week photo up here soon, but for now let's look at a jealous Bilbo cat instead...  That's a fabulous organic Baby K'tan carrier (not done up properly, fyi) I'm using.  I'd wondered if the size small would work, and I think it will definitely do the trick if it can manage a kitty boy.  :)

If you are a stranger (or friend, or even foe, I suppose), feel free to leave a comment on my blog entries.  I just finished my obsessive blog search "33 weeks pregnant blog" (I like to look at the week I'm coming up to), and I was thinking how I should really leave comments on the entries I so enjoy.

The last two nights I've woken up probably around 2 a.m. and not been able to go back to sleep for 2+ hours due to sneezing and nose-blowing.  Darn ragweed.  It's turning into my favorite season, and I can't fully enjoy it because I don't dare venture outside for too long.  I only just started feeling like I have a normal nose, and it's already 4 p.m. the following day!  Hopefully this ragweed season comes to an end soon.  It's tough adding that to an already rough night's sleep.

My walks to class have brought on Braxton Hicks like crazy.  I just try to grin and bear it and say, "It's great; my body's preparing for what's to come".  It's not painful, per se, just extremely uncomfortable.

Our weekends through October 6th have suddenly filled up with fun stuff.  We have our first baby shower tomorrow-- with Nate's extended family!  Then the next weekend I'm having a more traditional one thrown by a good friend and my sis-in-law, and that night we're having a hopefully huge house party to celebrate one of our last "pre-baby" days with friends.  It's funny to think back to last summer/fall, when we seemed to have friends over frequently for porch beers or late-night games.  I obviously was not pregnant then, and Nate was only taking a couple of classes, so we loved hosting impromptu gatherings.

I can't even express how relieved/lucky I feel that we're able to do this baby adventure during a time when I'm just taking classes (that aren't terribly tricky) and Nate is also just taking classes.  It means we are home way more than we'd be in any other situation.  And my classes are always night classes (and I'm actually going to try for an online one in the spring term), so I can sleep in and rest whenever needed.  And we've always been super frugal with money (splurging only on healthy groceries, for the most part, and going out to eat at local yummy places... oh yeah, and also things like a homebirth midwife, Bradley classes, and placenta encapsulation), so that won't be an issue.

It's kind of funny how I've never really been a big baby fan (and neither has Nate really), and quite honestly, I don't really even know if you could call me one now.  But it's so amazing how consuming it all becomes... I mean, I hardly ever think of much else, like an obsessed woman.  The cool thing is that a couple of friends of ours just had their first/only baby, and I imagine they are a bit like us, not the type to go baby crazy over other babies but excited and fascinated by their own.  I do wonder, though, if I'll start being more 'into' others' kiddos once I go through it myself, you know?  I have definitely had moments the past 8 months when I've thought back to how I reacted to friends' pregnancies... and I wish I had reached out more, asked more questions, been more interested in what was going on with them, etc.  But I think it's something that you just can't connect to without something similar to relate it to.

I've now gotten into the 'hungrier' part of pregnancy, perhaps because it feels like baby shifted down a bit, freeing up my stomach.  Whatever the reason, I can eat more in one go, and I am craving the unhealthier things (and usually not giving in).  The one thing I could eat and eat is crushed ice, so that's not terrible.  I think I'm going to be a big frozen drink fan once baby's out (think: margaritas, etc.).  But the other things I keep wanting are chocolate cake with sweet icing, ice cream, and cinnamon rolls.  And I don't even normally like chocolate cake!

And now I must stop this endless update.  RAMBLING is my new talent.

And we are getting closer...

I am actually at 31 weeks pregnant today, but haven't done my weekly photo yet.  Boy, my belly is sure out there now.  Feeling good still, though, which is a happy thing.

The strangest change in the past week has been how very very HEAVY I feel.  My abs are achy, and when I walk to class, I feel such pressure down low, almost like the baby is starting to drop.  Might be early for that, but I think some people drop early, and from what I've read, it doesn't really mean labor is coming soon (although plenty of people say that).  I've also had some intense Braxton Hicks on that walk to class, usually at around the 15 minute mark (it's 30 min. there and 30 back).  I told Nate it's so interesting how it's not really painful, just an uncomfortable tightening.  Pregnancy is fascinating.

I'm trying to be a diligent student and work ahead for my classes, and it seems like my two courses should be timed nicely pregnancy-wise.  The nearest thing to a conflict that I have is a presentation on October 30th, a bit over a week before my due date.  But everything else is very workable, and missed classes just take points off my total (which is out of a huge number of points), so I'm thinking this should be okay.

We've also gotten baby's room ready, more or less.  It will be a LONG while before baby is in there (planning on bed-sharing or a co-sleeper if that doesn't work for quite a while), so in the meantime, people will be able to enjoy the cozy vintagey eclecticness of our baby room as it acts as a guest room (our 2nd guest room, so hopefully we'll have many visitors!).  :)

catch-up

(This formatting is aggravating, so sorry for the odd placement of the photos.)  As you can see, some time has passed since the last post.  Tomorrow I'll be at 30 weeks pregnant!  Baby belly has been growing, and I've made the frequent remark, "Them's birthin' hips!"  Everyone is guessing boy based on my prominent out-in-front low-carrying bump.  I'm guessing boy based on the fact that all of our friends are having girls.  Yes, I know neither one of these guesses has a scientific basis, so we shall be surprised come November (or late October?  eeks!).

Baby has been head down for quite a while now, so here's hopin' she/he stays that way (or gets back that way should a flip happen).  I've become pretty good at feeling out baby's body parts, especially the bumpy butt.  Kind of fun-- makes me feel all midwife-y!

As someone who has been reading pregnancy blogs like a madwoman, I'm going to put tons of details in here that probably most people don't care about at all.  Because I know there's some pregnant woman out there who will be so thankful for all the info.  It's really easy to feel kind of alone in pregnancy.  Even though Nate is awesome and excited, he just doesn't get it, biologically speaking.

This third trimester has brought a whole new meaning to the word "hormonal".  I had no idea that this was part of it.  I'm somewhat of an emotional wreck... like all of my feelings blend together, so I end up being a mess of angry/happy/sappy/lonely/sad/anxious/excited/etc.  It's rather exhausting.  And I really don't love how quickly I cry over dumb stuff.  I'm hoping that when classes start next week, I'll be better due to more distractions.

I'm not a fan of the pre-made preg. blogs, but I do like some of the things they share.  One of the things they talk about are things that you miss.  Here's what I miss:  laying on my stomach at night (or to have Nate give me a good back rub), being excited to hit up fun breweries over summer, NOT being an emotional wreck, having the energy to bust out a ton of projects all at once, having a stomach that's not squashed so that I can actually eat a whole meal, being able to roll over/get up/etc. without finding it to be a tricky thing, and that's about it.

Things I LOVE: baby movements, turning the baby room into a somewhat-bohemian-ish hangout ;), organizing hand-me-down clothes & cloth diapers, finding out we have amazing friends who have donated us almost everything we actually will need, seeing how excited my mom is, watching the Bilbo cat boy express his concern over the new baby stuff (and his joy over being held in our Baby K'Tan carrier!), interacting with baby's movements, reading birth stories (I especially loved the ones from Ina May's Guide to Childbirth book... really gave me an actual picture of what birth entails), and so much more.

So many friends are having babies this year... One friend just had hers like a month early (baby is fine!), another one is a week past her due date and getting anxious, another was a week before her scheduled c-section, Nate's cousin's was over a week past the due date, and another friend's came 2 weeks early.  Oh, and our midwife had her baby boy 2 weeks past the due date!  So, I need to be prepared for any timeline!  :)  I sure am glad we are planning a home birth, because I think that alone will ease my anxieties about the timing and everything.  Hospitals and such cause me a whole lot of anxiety.  Obviously if there's a need, we will be transferred (and our midwife has an awesome relationship with one of the local hospitals that is close by and would stay with us there through everything), but I'm hoping things work out here at home where I feel comfortable.  We'll have a pool here for labor, but I am not planning on a water birth.  I'm not the biggest fan of water, and even though I *know* the baby wouldn't take its first breath until surfacing, I think it would make me panic.

Phew, this was a whole lot of info.  I feel like pregnancy brain has turned me into a rambler.  I never used to email people very much, and I certainly never had so much to say about one topic, so this is purely a pregnancy symptom.

newness

I think it has been a long, long while... new house, 

another new kitty, new baby belly, new career path. :) 

I...feel free

Signs of summer... fresh air through screens, happy music blasting, bicycle rides to everywhere, smiles, lilac smells, motivation, local produce, rainy warmth, dirty contentment, pleasantly aching muscles.

to do or not to do

to do: run, bicycle, do push-ups, do crunches, write the beginnings of a story, research bilingual education (dual immersion?), write new cover letter, do more laundry, do dishes, fill the goodwill bin, write Alena a letter (yes, by hand)

It is so easy to think of the many things waiting to engage my brain and body. I'm not even imagining my school 'to-do' list, because that stuff will 'get done' at school. However, these household 'to-dos' will not get done. Why? Because I find zero motivation after waking up to a snow-covered car. I feel no purposeful energy after coming home from a half-day training that covered everything that was already covered in the previous training. I lack any sort of drive to accomplish things when all I want to do is snuggle up under a blanket and find a relatively empty contentment... as in an EMPTY mind. I get tired of the daily racing-mind frustrations and today I opt for the opposite extreme, which sounds soooo incredibly lazy. Yet, on this COLD mid-April day, I am quite okay with my choice to do absolutely *nothing*. I'll get to my to-do list... tomorrow.

p.s. It helps to have a kitty and a hubby feeling the exact same way. The extent of our workout today will be the creation of a thai curry dinner (with some needy meowing thrown in by the feline friend).

please excuse this blog for hibernating (we're back!)

Already mid-April? Time has been moving quickly, and of course, as we move into warm weather, my brain gets all discombobulated, thoughts going every which way. That fresh air rush of emotions to the mind... making me happy with a bittersweet base. We are in a good place.

Crazy job that I love in a crazy district that I laugh about and have learned to navigate. I've made a few friends at work, including one fantastic partner-in-crime. We seek out the good in our middle school world, encouraging the kiddos and spreading a 'positive' vibe. I often say to people that I'm lucky I'm old, and that I have years of experience, because otherwise this job would have suffocated me. But instead I was able to make it my own, even with no support or direction. Hmmm... I suppose it helped that I had the Abu Dhabi experience first-- couldn't get any more disorganized than that!

My hubby and the Bilbo cat snuggle me regularly, so I can say that home life is fantastic. Nate has been substitute teaching this year, and he is really good at it. He also scored high enough on the LSAT to qualify for a full-ride to law school at Cooley next year, so that will be a new adventure. Bilbo has gone from being the under-the-bed-only cat to a cat that cries sadly when I leave and sprints over to me when I get home. Mr. Bilbo Baggins Boy is quite possibly my best friend.

Friends! It's been especially fun to make some new down-to-earth friends here in Grand Rapids. People here seem more inclined to venture out or come over or have us over, and we do wine nights and game nights and bar nights. I'm definitely excited for this warmer weather so we can do more bicycling to friends' houses. We biked to a fun bar last weekend, and it was great to get the exercise and also feel that we were saving gas. Nate has been obnoxious (but yes, admirably so) all winter with his "I bicycle to school" gig; he refused to get dropped off at his sub jobs and instead opted to ride his bike ALL WINTER LONG. Awesome, most def, but obnoxious because he simply put me to shame. Maybe now warm weather will help me redeem myself.

I've also never fully known how nice it is to have family close by... Nate's folks are a half-hour away, my parents an hour away, and Nate's brother's family lives within walking distance. And it's just perfect. I feel a little lucky that we did our crazy brief UAE stint-- It made 'this' all the more valuable; 'this' being our space in time here in lower Michigan.


p.s. Follow this link to find a yummy recipe blog as well as a chance to enter and win the give-away; I was kind of excited about the mug I could win (it looks like a large one, quite pleasing to the hand)... So, add your comment to this blog entry, and we'll see who wins. The oopsitsvegan folks live in Ann Arbor, my old college town. :)
http://oopsitsvegan.blogspot.com/2011/03/national-pancake-dayand-give-away.html